My wife has been gone for a week.
I miss her.
The kids miss her.
The dog Goldie misses Mommy so much I found her hitchhiking to find a new family.
On the second day as we all came around to the reality of Mommy is actually gone, the cereal ran low (since that’s all I know how to make), and the lawn started to die (since she programs the sprinklers and I can’t find the panel), I wiped the tears away as I sent each child to school.
Not their tears – mine.
And the dog’s.
The house quiet, I went to the restroom and realized as I walked out:
I set the seat down!
Hmm.
For what purpose?
She’s not here. No reason to do that now.
I went back into the restroom and defiantly put the seat up!
Kind of silly, but it felt liberating, and a little rebellious.
No seat in this house remains up, but now the master bedroom restroom gets the bachelor pad experience.
Proudly, I returned to my office and began to work.
Devoutly, I pressed forth and could make little progress.
Oddly, I could not stop thinking about what I had done!
Less than 3 feet from me, through the wall, sat a toilet seat with the lid up, and I couldn’t work.
I couldn’t think of anything else!
It was 9 AM and the soonest a child would return home would be 3 PM, and yet even they would never know.
By 9:45 AM the torture was too much.
I returned to the restroom, and upon seeing the toilet seat up, I rushed in to save it, replacing it back to home base, it’s rightful place, it’s destiny.
Setting the seat down, the home felt complete again, the universe and order restored.
I expected to see my wife rushing in and surprising me, saying I’d passed the test, cutting her trip short, because harmony found in toilet seats down turn planes around.
But she didn’t do that, and I’m still here alone, just the kids, the dog, and I.
Yet the seat is down. In it’s rightful place. It just seems the best, or only, thing it should do.
This may be among the oddest posts I’ve ever shared, but it’s what this week was: attempting to keep order while the order caretaker is missing.
The Promise is to do our best to keep all things in their rightful state, to ensure habits are heading us in the proper direction, rituals and daily minuscule commonalities create a cumulative moral fortitude of commitment keeping, whether anyone is watching or not.
If the seat’s up on the other side of the wall, good luck getting your work done at all…and if it happens to be the seat on your throne, set it down even if you’re alone!
Promise kept.
P.S. The kids joined Goldie and are hitchhiking to Burger King.
Not really. But…
Goldie’s learned to fend for herself. The DoorDash guy delivered a dog bone.
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~ Jason Hewlett
Husband, Father, Writer, Mentor, Hiker
- Speaker Hall of Fame * Award-Winning Entertainer * Mentor
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16 Responses
In a previous post you wrote about making your bed, even at the hotel. That is something I do as well. I still make the bed when my wife is gone. My only defiance is that I place just half a plethora of pillows, the ones that belong on her side of the bed. Then I send a picture to let her know she’s missed. It’s my way of flirting with her everyday.
LOLOLOL! Brilliant! Thank you for sharing and the laugh. I also refuse to place the pillows, except upon making the entire bed for her return. But this is a great new idea.
This is hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
🙂 Thank you so much! I love that you thought that!
You’re a funny guy. Tami will be relieved when she returns home.
LOL!! Well done my friend. The royal flush comment.
Things are just not right when our people aren’t with us. Totally get you! Thank you for continuing your work.
Thank you Rita, great hearing from you. Tell your class hello from me!
I really got a laugh out of this one! Being the mother of 5 boys plus a husband, I could relate! Thanks
Hahaha! Awesome. Thank you my friend.
That’s awesome, I thought you were going to tell us that nature had called and you fell in; “Now you know why the toilet seat goes down” :).
LOL! I hope it’s ok that it was about something else!
It’s wonderful to hear how much you value your wife and miss her and all her big and little touches when she’s gone. if it happens to be the seat on your throne, set it down even if you’re alone! Your promise and habit to place the toilet seat in its rightful place is an act of thoughtfulness! You’re so funny saying cold cereal is all you know how to make! Ha! I liked this clever line, “if it happens to be the seat on your throne, set it down even if you’re alone!” I got a good laugh! And I got your deeper message! Thank you!
So kind of you, Karen. Thank you very much.
It’s the little things that make it all worth it!!
I love how you cherish your wife and kids!!
Yes we tend to find our selves doing things and catching ourselves more when our spouses are away for work or for fun. It’s almost as if we are thinking they left because we didn’t do what we were supposed to 😝 lol
LOL! That’s very funny and so true. Thank you for commenting.